Returning to work and play after loss is difficult at the best of times. But if they are also your creative outlet, or they require you to be creative to perform, then returning to work or play becomes even more challenging.
Creativity comes from the heart and the mind. It involves connecting with innovative thinking, challenging yourself to imagine beyond what you have seen or done before, and to express yourself in an outward development of something new. Creativity flows most easily when you are passionate and focused on the task at hand. When the subject excites and motivates you to explore. It flourishes when you have the freedom to step aside and ponder a road block, and then to throw everything you have into its completion.
Grief presents as a competitor against many aspects of creativity. It scars your heart and taints your mind. It prevents you from thinking forward, instead encouraging you to desperately cling to the past. It makes it impossible to concentrate, squanders excitement and motivation, and prompts you to question your lack of passion and enthusiasm. Any pause in structured thought allows heavy, consuming emotions to flood in, leaving you exhausted and unable to give. With no clear boundary, grief creeps in and suffocates creativity.
Ironically, grief in itself is a challenge that creativity is required to help you overcome. You must commit to healing, to growing, to recovering from its wounds. You must find new ways to live, to love, to survive, and explore parts of yourself that have previously been left unnoticed. When grief devours, you are forced to take the time to rest, to connect with the darkness, to view the world around you from a different perspective. In doing so, you are given the tools required to create something truly beautiful. Like a caterpillar encased in a dark cocoon, grief engulfs. The act of emerging from grief as a new version of yourself, is in fact one of immense creativity. The beauty can be found in the colours, the hope, the freedom, but you must not be afraid to spread your new wings and fly.